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7:04 PM

Thursday April 24, 2008 - Wine Type

A Featured Wine Type Article

A Redneck's Guide to Wine Appreciation

First, allow me a moment to elucidate my qualifications: My grandpa was a bootlegger in the backwoods of Tennessee during prohibition. That's God's honest truth, and that bit of family history proves without question that I have both redneck DNA and an intimate knowledge of alcoholic beverages. Gramps' legacy lives on.

Both of those bits of trivia are worthy of much greater discussion, but today I need to stick to the point. So, let's take a look at our subject du jour, the Big Vino, the juice of the gods, that is to say, wine.

The first big thing to understand, Bubba (or Bubbette--we rednecks have advanced with the times), is that wine ain't 7-UP. Now, I know that many of you are used to mixing wine and 7-UP, but the point of this little article is to provide an opportunity for personal growth. Keep reading, or maybe have your kid read it out loud.

Now what I mean by saying that wine ain't 7-UP is simply this: If you bought a can of 7-UP down at Elmer's Market and then drove to your uncle Willie's Gas & Groc and bought another can, you'd expect both cans to taste the same, assuming Uncle Willie's half-brother had not done something really disturbing again. Most of us consider the fact that one can tastes just like every other to be a Good Thang.

Not so, with wine. Rather than mixing together chemicals and water in a top-secret combination to yield identical tasting drinks, wine makers have to rely on Mother Nature. And we all know that Mother Nature can be a... bit fickle. In addition to the wine maker's skill, the grape, the soil, the storage, and even the weather during the growing year all have a tremendous effect on the taste of a given vintage.

This explains Uncle Willie's homebrew, of course: Combine a winemaker with no skill, incredibly disgusting grapes thrown out by the Piggly Wiggly store, the fungus-inducing weather of the Deep South, soil worthy of an EPA Superfund site, and long-term storage in plastic buckets, and you get a vintage that works better as concrete cleaner.

The Yin to that Yang is a skilled vintner who has studied his craft for years, grapes cultivated on the warm southern-facing slopes of the Columbia River Basin or Cascade Mountains, 300 days of sunshine per year with cool, crisp nights during harvest, nutrient-rich volcanic soil, and long-term oak or stainless steel barrel storage, and you have the magnificent wines of Washington State. They don't all taste the same, of course, due to different local soils, weather conditions, and different wine makers. But I assure you, Bubba/Bubbette, that is a really Good Thang.

Part of the fun of being a wineaux, i.e. a redneck who likes good wines, is the search for the elusive "great vintage". Since no two vintages taste the same, it is incumbent upon us to taste lots and lots of wines from different vintages. That's a Good Thang, too, as you might imagine. Now, you'll find some hoity toities who will try to tell you what's good and what ain't, but here's the real truth: A good wine is a wine you like. Period, end of story. Anybody tells you different, tell 'em to put a cork in it.

At first, I didn't drink for taste. Like most of my redneck kin, I drank because I was, uh... thirsty. But if you slow down and actually start thinking about the taste a bit, I guarantee you'll find some wines that tickle your fancy.

Having found some great vintages (and write them down when you find them, or buy a case or two), the next Good Thang about wine is that it was made for food. Yep, fer shure. Unlike Uncle Willie's homebrew, you'll not only be able to keep your food down when you have a good wine, you'll find that some wines actually make the food taste better. And I don't mean after the second or third bottle. I really mean that you can be stone cold sober, take a sip of wine, shovel in bit of food, and both the wine and the food will taste better together than either does alone.

In case those instructions are not clear, please understand that I mean that you should swallow the wine first, and then take a bite of food. As tempting as it might be to try to mix it all up together, wine ain't a milkshake, neither. Save that trick for Nestle's Quick chocolate mix. For those who don't know, you take a spoonful of chocolate mix in your mouth, pour in some milk, and swish it around. Rednecks from southern states may also add several chunks of banana.

But I digress. Back to wine.

A second fun thing about being a wineaux is finding "wine and food pairings" that you like. There are some general guidelines, but once again, what tastes good to you is really the definition of what is good. Here are a couple things that I've found to be true for my tastes:

1. Wine shouldn't be stronger tasting than the food you're serving. Hoity toities may scream in anguish, but the first great wine and food pairing that suited me was a California Zinfandel served with hamburgers drowned in a potent barbecue sauce. Zinfandels are often "peppery" in taste and therefore complement a strong barbecue sauce quite well.

Conversely, milder main dishes may call for a lighter wine. I found that some light cheeses go great with Sauvignon Blanc, which is a light and sometimes slightly fruity white wine.

2. Sometimes seemingly odd combinations work out quite well, too. I like blue cheese on crackers with a fairly sweet dessert wine like Roza Riesling. I have no idea why that works for me. Maybe my taste buds are dead from too many pork rinds.

Regardless, wine tasting is an adventure, and a kick in the pants, too. A few years ago I hired a limousine to take me, my wife, and some friends on a wine tasting tour of the Wenatchee Valley in central Washington. Not only was it great fun, but I discovered several fantastic family-operated wineries along the way. We still visit these wineries several times a year for concerts, special dinners, and of course, wine club pick-ups!

By the way, a wine club pick-up is not a new way for you single redneck men to meet women--ya still gotta save that for the family reunion.

About the Author

When he's not writing articles for his fellow rednecks at (, Ross Lambert is sampling fine wines and playing guitar. He is also one of several software engineers at Confluent-Data, Inc., creators of (

A synopsis on Wine Type.

Wine That Goes Well With Crock Pot Meals...Really

You probably use your crock pot for holiday open-houses and everyday meals. But did you know that there are many meals you can create in your crock po...

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Wine Type Items For Viewing

Wine Enthusiast Aerating Wine Funnel with Removable Screen

The clean and minimalist design of the Wine Enthusiast funnel is the perfect accessory for decanting wines. Made of stainless steel so there’s no tainting or tarnishing the funnel allows you to pour wine into your decanter with ease. The removable screen will filter sediment and cleans easily. 5'H x 3 1/2'D.

Price: 29.95 USD

Headlines on Wine Type

Food and Wine Magazine

Wed, 09 Apr 2008 23:24:04 PDT
Food and Wine magazine provides awesome information about different types of culinary avenues and the types of wines that go best.

Types of wine

Thu, 10 Apr 2008 05:42:19 PDT
Types of wine article - didnt realise there were so many different types of wine grapes / varieties!

Types Of Wine

Thu, 10 Apr 2008 09:11:11 PDT
Nice little hub page on Types Of Wine

Rose Wine


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3:21 PM

2008 - Wine Developers

A Featured Wine Developers Article

Decorating Your Room With Wine Design Styles

Wine can be a great decorating inspiration that a lot of people find attractive. It is most often used as a theme when people are planning the d?cor of a kitchen or dining room. Individuals who chose this idea are in for a treat: most will find that collecting items to enhance their room is a very enjoyable pursuit. Things that they can look for can include anything from artwork featuring wine bottles to grapes and vines positioned for effect around the room.

You will come across many things with which to decorate your wine room. There really is a vast range of wine pictures to consider. The variety of items available is incredible and you will find a lot of inspiration to fine tune your design.

There is indeed a great diversity of original wine artwork to make your choice from. From artistic black and white pictures through to attractive scenes in full color you can find a picture that brings your scheme together.

You should consider basing the entire scheme of your room around one eye-catching and carefully selected piece of art. Your wine room can be designed around a wine picture that you are really keen on and want to show off in your home. It can be a really fun process to use your chosen piece of artwork as the center of your scheme. For instance you can draw inspiration from its colors to select the tones to use in the rest of your room and for the flooring, furniture and furnishings.

The function of the room you pick to decorate with a wine theme does not really have much of an incidence on how you apply this method. There is a great variety of suitable wine-inspired pictures to choose from for all kinds of room and they will help you achieve the look you are after. This process is a very good way to maximize the impact of your design ideas and helps tie in the entire scheme. There are many decorative items, wallpapers and borders that you can use all around your home for this.

You may however struggle to find the perfect piece of art to set off your entire room. If this is the case you should consider creating your very own. Simply paint your own original art on canvas, select an attractive frame and give it pride of place in your wine room.

About the Author

Andrew Caxton is a freelance writer for A website with tips on decorating styles, amongst many related topics.

Another short Wine Developers review

Proof! Wine Health Benefits

In the past 10-15 years, many researches have been conducted on Wine health benefits on our healthy lifestyle, or not so healthy life style. They have...

Click Here to Read More About Wine ...

Wine Developers Items For Viewing

Nesting Wine Funnel with Screen

A silverplated funnel of nickle-plated brass and it's fine mesh screen removable for cleaning filters away sediment permitting the pure color and taste of your wine to flourish 3'D. Gift boxed

Price: 24.95 USD

Current Wine Developers News

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New Sparkling Wines From Australia Bring Holiday Cheers to Florida

Thu, 30 Nov 2006 13:26:26 PST
Yellowglen Winery announced two new wines to the United States with the recent launch of its number one selling Australian sparkling wines. Pink and Yellow bubbles -- or champers, in Down Under lingo -- are now available in Florida for the first time ever, just in time for holiday celebrations.

wine, Champagne & spirits

Tue, 09 Jan 2007 01:22:15 PST
Since 1997 FinestWine offers an amazing collection.In one click, view and select 30,000 references of rare and fine wine, Champagnes & spirits, whisky as well as hard-to-find Californian, Italian, Spanish, Australian and more...

Its Wine Time! Ausleses Put Sweetness on the Table.

Fri, 19 Jan 2007 10:27:34 PST
Wine lovers take note! Get the scoop on this delicious Australian riesling.

Australia as a fashion destination

Tue, 06 Feb 2007 04:19:54 PST
Australia is known for its wines and dairy products but never high fashion. Thanks to its name-droppable citizens like Nicole Kidman, Naomi Watts, Cate Blanchett, and yes, Akira Ishikawa (who, we heard, is actually Australian and not Japanese), the country's fashion industry is finally getting a second look.

Wine Pairing


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&type=page">Add to any serviceSocial Bookmark
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